Early life Edit
Nothing is known about Pirk's background. He is presumed to be born on Earth. At some point in life, he enrolled into P-Fleet, and in 2363, somehow became captain of the USS Kickstart without undergoing any P-Fleet captain training.
P-Fleet service Edit
Pirk was aboard the Kickstart, orbiting Mynos 3, when he received a distress call from the captain of USS Excessive. Answering the call, Pirk ordered that Kickstart be taken to Earth, where he commanded a retaliation against the Plingon invaders that was followed an almost flawless victory. Some time later, during the Kickstart's five-month mission, he was ordered to fly to Fibula Sector, near Plingon space, to eliminate any enemies there. Once there, his ship engaged three Plingon Battlebruisers, destroying two with its weapons, and one by tactical - albeit sluggish - use of the rear sucking beam. This led to him losing the Kickstart and having to evacuate on board space-sleds. Eventually, the late Kickstart's crew reached a P-Fleet space station where it boarded the CPP Kickstart-2.
For two years, Pirk and his crew had to run errands, getting used to the new controls. A few days after "Moondate 12.Delta-by-Pie-are-square" - when the Kickstart accidentally destroyed the P-Fleet Sparrow-class cruiser "The Relevant" - Command ordered Pirk to do reconnaissance of a suspected Romuclan base in the Vega system. After learning of the Romuclans' plan to attack P-Fleet's outpost in the Gamma Sector, Pirk reported his finds to Command, and was ordered to defend the station at all costs. Despite the heavy loses on both sides, Pirk emerged victorious, and was promoted to the rank of Admiral.
Some time after the Gamma Sector battle, Pirk was sent on a diplomatic mission to forge an alliance with the mysterious Zarquons. The latter issued that he compete against the other alliance-seeking races to find a powerful artefact. Despite winning the competition, Pirk lost the the artefact - which turned out to be a scepter - to Hans Duo, who sent the traitorous former P-Fleet captain Hummer to retrieve it. For losing the scepter, and for subsequently starting a war with the Zarquons, Pirk was once again demoted to the rank of Captain.
A week later, he was ordered to assist in the war against the Zarquons, but decided to make a stop on Earth as the refitted Kickstart's mainframe needed a crack. Being bored, and off-duty, Pirk went to the halludeck to entertain himself, but got stuck in the simulation because of a surprise attack by the Romuclans. Finally freeing himself, he returned to his post just some five minutes before his new shift began.
Later still, P-Fleet was attacked by the Korg, and Pirk's crew, among other ships, were ordered to counterattack. On Pirk's orders, Info successfully uploaded a virus into the Korg Box, and destroyed it, but the Korg managed to send a ship into Earth's past and assimilate humanity, so the Kickstart had to go into the past. Once there, Kirk, Dwarf and Info had to protect Jeffrey Cochbrane from the Korg so that he could innitiate first contact with the Vulgars. Although their attempt was initially successfull, the Kickstart was destroyed in orbit by the Korg, and Pirk decided that it was best to go native, since it was impossible for them to return to their time. When he later learned that the Vulgars decided to instead party with Cochbrane, he launched a successful attack on a Russian research base - where the Vulgar ship was transported to after being sold - and created the C.P.P. Kickstart, which he used to gain the support of Russian president Vladimir Ulyannov, and take over the world. The plan was a success and he had Ulyannov executed. He then proceeded to issue orders such as rebuilding Earth's monuments that were destroyed during his conquest, and making Suomi the official language of Earth, among others. He also pooled Earth's resources into funding the construction of P-Fleet, which he later took into a parallel universe for conquest. In the parallel universe his fleet encountered the intergalactic station Babel 13, and attempting to conquer it lead to P-Fleet's - as well as the station's - destruction. The Kickstart's main crew, now evacuated to the C.P.P. Kalinka, made a jump into a maggot-hole to escape the explosion of Babel 13's reactor, however the Kalinka proved to be too cheaply-made to survive the jump and the imminent crash on the newly-discovered planet, so Pirk ordered he be beamed to the planet's surface with Info and Dwarf, only to end up stranded in an ice-age.